Toilets: It's Time for Change

It's the age old battles with men vs. women... the Battle of Toilet Seat Downs, the Whyistheflooryellow Inquisition, and the unforgettable War of Ohnoshesatinpiss Runforyourlife.  Many men have lost a limb over these things, and many women have experienced rage and fury beyond what she ever imagined she was capable of.  And all for what?

Flush toilets date all the way back to the 26th century BC.  The ones we use today date back more to the early 1900's but still... nothing has really changed at all since 1980, and the basic design hasn't changed since the early 1900's.  That is a problem.

Here's where I think we solve the battle... Recognition that toilets were not made for men.  Not for peeing anyway.  If you understand the anatomy, you'd understand that peeing, for a guy, isn't as simple as point, shoot & aim.  It's actually more unpredictable than that... the "stream" is different every time (just like it is for women).  So women have to try to understand that it's not that he's necessarily being a lazy pig when he pees.  If he's going to be a lazy pig, it's going to be when he fails or refuses to clean up after himself when he's done.

My big frustration is that men refuse to just SIT DOWN.  It comes down to one of two things... their idiotic notion that it somehow threatens their manhood (in the privacy of a bathroom where no one can see them), OR the notion that it's less convenient to have to take another 5 seconds to sit down, and then stand up.  Sitting down would solve everything.

But they won't do it.  Most men are too lazy to lift the toilet seat & put it back down, much less actually sit down & stand back up (ugh what a nightmare!).  It makes no sense, but whatever.  We still love them in spite of their horrible bathroom behavior.

So back to my solution... toilets weren't made for men.  What we need is something that attaches to modern toilets, that can be easily installed, and that is intended only for use by men.  I'm thinking some kind of awesome funnel/hose design that attaches to the side of the toilet, "stretches" & is hand held when in use, and is reattached to the side of the toilet when not in use.  Something that keeps clean & is easy to clean...

Something that is made for men, and that can attach to existing toilets would revolutionize in-home toilets, and would make for much happier men & women!  So there it is... now someone needs to go out & invent it.  Kthxbai.